Sunday – Deep House remix. 05/02/12. Disco Stu & John Monkman – Don’t Have To Be Beautiful (Original [Prince] mix)

Sunday’s child started a revolution,

Saturday night’s it’s Queen, Sunday morning it’s Prince, to those who had a big night, they are probably the same person and you are running for the door, for those who appreciate music (and this blog), you’ll be sticking around for more.

In a world full of musical pseudonyms, it’s actually refreshing to know that the singer we have known as; The Artist Formally Known As Prince, The Symbol, Alexander Nevermind & Joey Coco was actually born Prince Rogers Nelson (named after his fathers stage persona).

Talk about dedication to your craft, the ‘Worlds Sexiest Vegetarian’ is credited with playing all 27 of the featured instruments from his first solo album. He is the first artist to have a #1 single, album and film in the USA concurrently with Purple Rain, Purple Rain & Purple Rain (who will be next Beiber or Gomez?). Prince became the justification for those lovely ‘Explicit Lyrics’ labels your mother loves so much with his disgusting Darling Nikki (The Bitch), and this was around the time of 2 Live Crew no less. It is not as widely known though that he is credited with single handedly knocking down the Birlin wall (a small garden wall outside of Minneapolis), solving a decade long dispute between two farmers, what a guy.

Prince became the ultimate Indian Giver when he gave the funk band Mazarati his short demo ‘Kiss‘ for them to use in their debut album. Upon hearing the band’s complete rework the spoilt little brat realized it’s immense potential and gladly took it back to be rerecorded and released as you know today (he did keep their backing vocals intact though).

If you want to know more about the single and a double dose of past gone by, check the official music video with classic treatment from VH1’s Pop Up Video.

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Today’s remix has been making the run up the Beatport 100 recently making it to #6 which for a Deep House track is something pretty substantial. Disco Stu & John Monkman have made this song so relaxing you will swear you heard it at your last doctors visit, although it probably wasn’t a plastic surgeons office, the whole idea of ‘you don’t have to be beautiful’ doesn’t sell well there.

Calling this a full fledged remix is a bit of a stretch, but it does sample the sharp original guitar riff that makes your hair stand on end. It doesn’t sound like Prince’s falsetto voice was used (unless it is heavily filtered), but it does have a fun 80’s element to it with sonic tom toms and rubber band bassline that rubs you the right way to keep your hair (and your lady) at attention. This track doesn’t have to be beautiful, but it is, so i’ll probably fuck it.

Buy this track at Beatport

PS – John Monkman has got to be a happy man since the Russell Brand/Katy Perry marriage went down the tubes. Maybe now she will have time to listen to his quality remixes to THREE of her songs, check them out on his soundcloud page. And for those looking for Disco Stu, good luck finding him, do you know how many Disco Stu’s there are?


Friday – House remix. 27/01/12. Luthier – Magnum Opus (Crazibiza [Wild Cherry Funky Music] remix)

Friday’s child couldn’t jump,

Close your eyes and listen to the original song below, open them and prepare to be racist. Or is it reverse racism? Man I don’t know with all the political correctness bullshit today. I tell you what, when someone tells me to Play That Funky Music, White Boy, I want that person to truly expect that I am far too white to do anything resembling funky. This is the musical version of White Men Can’t Jump, I mean I guess now that I think about it, it wouldn’t make that much sense for African American’s to be telling white boys to play funky music, I mean, they owned that shit and all the swag that accompanied it.

Inspiration comes from wonderful places, in actuality, the above really did happen, a table full of black patrons approached the band and teased the band mercifully into millions of dollars because the ‘white boys werent playing any funky music’.

Apparently this song formed the basis for The Rolling Stones mantra, to play funky music til they die, (which is surprising really; that they arent dead yet, it does make you want to take health PSA’s a little less seriously eh?). Wild Cherry disbanded in 1979, but the song has lived on through far too many remakes, it helped Taylor Hicks win American Idol, it helped Adam Lambert lose American Idol, and unfortunately helped Vanilla Ice become way too famous, for without it, a little known B-side track on Vanilla’s version Ice Ice Baby may never have been noticed. Thankfully we have two very talented producers to help take the remake’s taste out of our mouths and repackage the original with some added sugar and spice.

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Luthier, aka Rômulo & Thiago, hail from one of the newer hotbeds of international dance music; Brazil. Their work has been gaining recognition far and wide throughout the Tech House world, so it’s interesting that today’s remix of Wild Cherry’s 1976 single is listed as their ‘Magnum Opus’. Latin for ‘Greatest Work’, this is a title reserved for the height of ones artistic career. Releasing a track this good, it’s not hard to see why they have given it such a grandiose label, but the only problem I have with this is; having listened to their range of work; they were creatively and rhythmically strong years ago with Physical Realities, and still display that nature with better production techniques today in Mr Zepellin (btw another great remix). One could say that the sky is the limit for these two, but with the quality of their music (and the quality of today’s psychotropic drugs) why settle for earth? Luthier has potential for many a Magnum ‘XXL ribbed for her pleasure’ Opus’ and I hope you stick around to label it for them.

Today’s remix of Play That Funky Music starts you off with the original bass guitar riff building with looped vocals giving off a fun yet curious vibe of what’s to come. Sweet tribal percussion drops over rolling sub bass with such deep sensuality that makes you want to reach for another Magnum (you know what I mean). This is one sexy remix and had this been a Tuesday, I might have stopped here with one of the best Tech House remixes I have heard in a long time. But being Friday, it is house night, and we are lucky enough to have Luthier’s track further remixed by the superstar Hungarian DJ duo Crazibiza.

Soundcloud preview below, to listen to full track go to YouTube version here

Buy this track at Beatport

Crazibiza aka Tommyboy & Agebeat, have exploded onto the EDM scene with such vengeance and furious anger that would make Samuel L Jackson give up his tasty Kahuna Burger for a few more minutes of such aural pleasure. Their music bounces off the page larger than Kim Kardashian’s ass and plays sweeter than replays of Snooki getting punched in the face. They have a style, and that style is ‘play every track they make’ so I don’t need to describe today’s remix too much, just press play. I am a white boy, and proud of it, can I dance? Sort of. Can I jump? Well, I used to. Can I play funky music? Now I fucking can!

Soundcloud preview below, to listen to full track go to YouTube version here

Buy this track at Beatport

Sunday – Funky Lounge remix. 11/12/12. Lenny Kravitz – Black & White America (The Players Union edit)

Sunday’s child had a dream.

What are two things that African American & Jewish people have in common? Think Subway’s Footlong and Wendy’s Baconator (hold the Bacon), it’s their junk, their shvantz one might say, for obviously different reasons, that people constantly seem to talk about (and their sweet ass ‘fros). So when you take the most famous Black Jew, short of a badly tanned Jon Stewart, you have an instant recipe for some sweet streamlined lovin.

Along with Lenny Kravitz’ diminishing dreads, so go his hits. Don’t expect any gold singles for the 2011 album ‘Black & White America’, but like a Mojito/Chilli/Sorbet concoction, it is a refreshingly experimental album that blends soul, funk and rock with an important message about how far the USA has come since the Civil Rights era. The eponymous title track is a true to life story about Kravitz’ upbringing in which he was born to a white Jewish man and an African American woman in the 60’s. Check out the music video for a charming chronological photo album of his story.

Just when you think this track couldn’t become any more Negrophiliac (what Kravitz nearly called this album), The Players Union come along with an intent to impregnate all the ladies in the front row, with a beautifully well done edit that wouldn’t be out of place in a Shaft movie. Melting soft soothing synths over the original’s classy funk bassline make it enough to kvell over, but then they add some oisgeshtrozelt sax & Kravitz’s mensch-worthy vocals, making this track a must have for every five-star Manhattan cocktail lounge, or even better, your own lounge room as you set the mood to shtup with your shayner maidel.

Free download on Soundcloud page

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